Some rest

The past few weeks i have been quiet over here but i took some rest. We finally know what caused all the problems and now i just need to let my body detox from all the insuline. It was indeed an insuline allergy which caused all the commotion in my body and i am no longer allowed to take it. In a week i am getting a new medicine to control my diabetes and i do hope my body will adjust to it. So i will take up blogging here again slowly.
Finished the cowl for my mother in law and i have started making one for myself. Will post a picture soon.

Positive

With so many sad things going on in the world and my personal life i do refuse to let it define me. My true nature is quite positive and even in times of depression i can still crack a joke or enjoy beautiful things. The possibility for me to create has grown to a minimum in the past few years but still i love to look at nature or to see what others have created. I am happy that i have never lost that ability. The only problem that is has caused is that i now have a major list of things that i still want to crochet, knit or sew. Hmmmm, well, that is not the worst thing in the world is it now?

19 kilo's

In total i gained 19 kilo's. 19 kilo's in two weeks! Last week on Monday i was at the doctor and there i had gained 12 kilo's. On Friday i had gained an extra 7 kilo's. I was at the A&E at the hospital, they took my blood, had me having a CT scan. All that showed that i do not have a tumor, there seems to be nothing wrong with my heart, no fluids. Nothing out of the ordinary. The iv line was removed from my arm and i was allowed to go home. Now what? In the car driving home i got to thinking of my insuline, i have been using it since the start of January and my body has not liked it one bit. Tried a few different ones, on gives me pain during the injection and the hours after and others gave me allergic reactions. So i went back to the one that gave me pain but no other problems. I decided to stop injecting myself for a few days. So, i should have taken one of Friday round eight pm. and i did not. Round 10 pm i noticed that the tightness on my chest had gone and i no longer had the feeling as if someone was trying to push my ribs apart. That was already an improvement. Ofcourse i had instructed my husband what to do if i needed it anyway.
On Sunday i got a blessing at church, not getting a direct confirmation that everything would be resolved soon but that i would have to hand my problems over to Heavenly Father and that He would support me. Yesterday, on Monday, i noticed that i am starting to feel different, as if a veil has been lifted from my mind. The fog round my head that i have felt for so long is disappearing. My husband has noticed and today in a phone conversation with a manager at work he noticed it as well. 'You sound a lot more clearer than you have done in the past few months'.
I went to the GP this morning, i have lost one kilo since Friday, my belly is not as bloated as it was last Friday but a new appointment has been made for me for next week in hospital. I am not letting it rest.

Relief?

Going to hospital this afternoon, still do not know what is going to happen and what will be done. Belly has grown again, when my husband and i wanted to kiss good night last night in the hallway the first thing he felt was my belly :( If i do need to stay i have two books to read. Jambusters and A girl called Jack. Hope they are as nice as i expect them to be.

Scary

Since bumpie grew this weekend i contacted the doctor's office. They wanted to see me as soon as possible so ten minutes later i was there already. The doctor ofcourse prodded and investigated and called the surgeon of me, especially after we found out that in ten days time i had gained 12 kilo's. Now i have an appointment for coming Thursday in the afternoon. I really do not know what is going on but i am starting to get scared and i do not easily get scared when it gets to my health. We'll see. I have asked for a blessing for the sick in the coming days, since my husband is not a member of the church i cannot ask it of him.

Now really starting to feel it

Bumpy woke me up during the night, it felt as if i was lying on something hard. It was just bumpy :( Ah well, we'll see. Been working on my mother in laws scarf. Every little block has been connected to another one and now i have crocheted the first round, nine more left to go. Picture will follow later

Still a mess now